what chuck wore

“What? No, she loves orange. There’s no bowtie,...

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 07:20:00 -0400

“What? No, she loves orange. There’s no bowtie, true, but the sheen of the jacket more than makes up for it. You know who I am. There’s no way this won’t end with … yeah, with a bang. At least three times tonight and probably a few more times in the morning. The flowers? Yellow roses.

… Yellow roses symbolize what? Friendship? Are you serious? But they coordinate so well with the pocket square. What color symbolizes ‘no one leaves a mark quite like you do’? Yeah, literally.”

“This jacket … is my personal Scarlet Letter. I...

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 21:56:16 -0400

“This jacket … is my personal Scarlet Letter. I can’t deny my virility — to myself or to the beautiful women who flock to me. I am the Pied Piper of dirty, strings-free sex. This jacket symbolizes that. I do not cuddle, says the jacket. I screw and go, because I’m Chuck Bass. And you’re okay with that, because I’m Chuck Bass.”

“Glance upward, Waldorf. Look off into the distance with...

Tue, 28 Jul 2009 17:11:44 -0400

“Glance upward, Waldorf. Look off into the distance with me and contemplate our future together. It is a future full of bowties. A future in which I may start referring to you by your first name. I feel good about us, almost as good as I feel about my pocket square/striped shirt combination. I’d even consider coordinating your outfits with my bowties. I’ve gone soft, Waldorf.

Except in my pants. Down there it’s business as usual. But you knew that.”

(via fuckyeahtvshows)

“Oh for fuck’s sake. I hatch a perfectly diabolical...

Mon, 25 May 2009 19:12:00 -0400

“Oh for fuck’s sake. I hatch a perfectly diabolical scheme to get you all hot and bothered, and you waste your sexual energy on Lord Robot? He’s not even wearing an ascot. I spent half an hour deciding on the best pocket square for my outfit and yet here you are with this fool, who didn’t even see fit to put on a damn vest. I really don’t get you, Waldorf. When I bang Girl Brooklyn, you are going to be pissed. Mark my words.”

“Nathaniel. If your uptight harpy girlfriend is going to...

Sun, 24 May 2009 10:10:00 -0400

“Nathaniel. If your uptight harpy girlfriend is going to call every five minutes, I’m going to need you to put your phone on silent. In case you forgot, Humphrey punched me in my face - as if I were a damn commoner. It still hurts, I’m hungover, I’m in bed with working class hos, and the only pair of pajamas I could find after last night’s bender are really better suited for the holiday season. It’s not a good morning.”

“Waldorf, I’m aware we’re on pretty shaky...

Tue, 19 May 2009 18:22:31 -0400

“Waldorf, I’m aware we’re on pretty shaky ground right now, and this probably won’t help. But those footless tights were a mistake. It’s darling that we coordinate so well, I’ll admit - it adds a very twee aspect to this whole love/hate thing we have going. But I just wish those damn tights weren’t footless. Who are you, Brooklyn? No, not that Brooklyn. Girl Brooklyn. The one with the video camera.

What do you mean, my socks and jacket are too matchy-matchy? That’s it, we’re officially on the outs again. And I am so going to bang Girl Brooklyn for that comment. You’ll see.”

“Note to self: buy more coats with fur collars. They...

Thu, 14 May 2009 20:22:24 -0400

“Note to self: buy more coats with fur collars. They convey the sentiment ‘I am a total p.i.m.p.’ in a classy, understated fashion even my father would approve of.”

“Woah, Archibald! Chuck Bass - wearer of pink, lover of...

Wed, 13 May 2009 17:42:47 -0400

“Woah, Archibald! Chuck Bass - wearer of pink, lover of many - does not need nose candy. I’ve got enough self confidence and stamina to outparty a hundred Lindsay Lohans. With that said, hand it over. There’s a certain self-righteous Humphrey I wouldn’t mind seeing all jittery and overstimulated. You know I love a good public humiliation.

And tuck in your shirt. You look like a slob.”

“Nathaniel, shut up. Your Blair problems are meaningless...

Tue, 12 May 2009 19:54:56 -0400

“Nathaniel, shut up. Your Blair problems are meaningless to me. I’m in the midst of a real crisis here. I’m worried I may have gone one pattern too far today, and I need complete silence while I contemplate my next sartorial move.”

“There is so much to learn from me, tiny van der Woodsen. ...

Mon, 11 May 2009 20:51:30 -0400

“There is so much to learn from me, tiny van der Woodsen. Let’s start with your hair. It is alarmingly swoop-y. Do you see this carefully cultivated bedhead? It’s meant to look as if I just woke up in the arms of some beautiful, anonymous model I’ll never see again.

Actually, that is how I started my day. But you’re still young. Let’s start small.”

“That’s rich, Humphrey. You’re a scholarship...

Sun, 10 May 2009 14:53:01 -0400

“That’s rich, Humphrey. You’re a scholarship kid from Brooklyn. And you have the audacity to show up at my hotel in Gap jeans? And then question my choice of trousers? Get out of my face. Go hit up an American Apparel and lecture somebody who cares.”

“I am too proud and rich to beg, Blair. With that said,...

Sun, 10 May 2009 11:48:18 -0400

“I am too proud and rich to beg, Blair. With that said, look how well we coordinate. The couple who wears green together stays together, even if one half of that couple lied to the other half so they could bang some stick figure interior decorator. And then countless other skanks. But enough about my summer.

… Okay, fine. In all honesty I was originally wearing lavender. I slipped away and changed once I saw your outfit. Waldorf, sometimes I think you know me too well.”

“Hrmph. I look way better in white. Whatever. I’ll just be...

Fri, 08 May 2009 21:37:56 -0400

“Hrmph. I look way better in white. Whatever. I’ll just be over here, brooding in a somewhat creepy fashion.”

“Yes, I am wearing the leather gloves. Yes, I am aware that...

Thu, 07 May 2009 22:33:52 -0400

“Yes, I am wearing the leather gloves. Yes, I am aware that they add a Patrick Bateman edge to the whole look. I’m okay with that. Do we have to go over who I am again?”

imchuckbass:

(via meesters)

“Nathaniel, trust me. The popped pink collar is a solid...

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 21:12:46 -0400

“Nathaniel, trust me. The popped pink collar is a solid decision. I’ve already slept with three girls today and it’s not even noon. Come back to me when you’re wearing a velour hoodie; maybe then you can start dispensing fashion advice. Maybe.”

“I am so uncomfortable right now, I can barely even focus...

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 01:10:00 -0400

“I am so uncomfortable right now, I can barely even focus on my surprisingly tasteful and understated grey suit (not to mention the baller timepiece I’m sporting). I mean, I love making her jealous, but even for me - Chuck. Bass. - this is a little low. Rubbing elbows with the proletariat low. I bet that bracelet is from Hot Topic. God, I am so uncomfortable right now.”

“This certainly is a jaunty hat, isn’t it. Note...

Fri, 13 Mar 2009 12:53:13 -0400

“This certainly is a jaunty hat, isn’t it. Note that my boat shoes feature the exact same shade of cerulean as the stripes on my shirt. I mean, this may be the beach, but I still have a reputation to maintain. Flip flops are so middle class.”

“Waldorf! How nice to see you. Hos, Waldorf. Waldorf,...

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 14:25:06 -0500

“Waldorf! How nice to see you. Hos, Waldorf. Waldorf, these are hos. Maybe you should take a cue from them. I mean, what’s with the neck ruffle?”

“Toned it down? What do you mean, you see I’ve...

Wed, 25 Feb 2009 09:30:56 -0500

“Toned it down? What do you mean, you see I’ve toned it down? I’m Chuck Bass. I still drink scotch at noon and I’ve still got Gossip Girl on speed dial. Sure, I’ve chosen a necktie over a bowtie today, but just look at the delightfully subtle jumble of patterns I’ve got going on here, Baizen. Toned it down my ass.

… Also I am wearing a pink shirt. Checkmate.”

“Cougars love me in maroon, Waldorf. And while...

Tue, 17 Feb 2009 15:13:34 -0500

“Cougars love me in maroon, Waldorf. And while we’re talking color choices, what’s with all the neutrals? I mean, shit, I’m virtually overflowing with testosterone, and yet I’m the only one in this scene wearing pink. Step it up, ladies.”